Having a Drink with the Girls

One of the things I really enjoy about living in Thailand is having a drink with the girls. I’m not talking about bargirls here but the ladies that run the country, those in their thirties and forties that have done the real work, children raised, homes built and every job available taken. If they were American they would be from the South and Larry McMurtry would write about them. Most of them are stocky, small breasted and have husbands who screw around on them.

The best time and place to catch them is before a party, they come around to chop the salad, slice the barbeque and organise the extra plates and glasses and eventually a bottle of beer and a bucket of ice will come out.
The men rarely join in on these lady drinks, one will wander in occasionally, accept a glass but move on, the only ones who are really welcome are the larp makers, always a man’s job where I live, raw meat finely chopped with chilli and herbs is a special party food.

After the work is finished they will sit in a circle and drink beer with ice, talking about what their kids are up to; whether their daughters are having sex too young, if their sons are doing drugs or why their husbands stay out all night. Nothing like the important things Western women talk about. A Farang is always welcome, they can’t believe he’s interested in them, after all he turned up with Sen’s daughter who hadn’t been seen for years and built a house and now he’s coming over with a couple of bottles of Leo beer.

The ladies immediately go a little coy, brushing at their hair with work hardened hands and giggling as they hold out their glasses for a top up. They insist he sits down, a chair is brought up by the youngest and a glass placed in his hand. They inquire about his health, he informs them that he has a hangover and his wife has beaten him up the night before for being drunk (Mia boxing).
Real victims of domestic violence they go into hysterics at the thought of a women beating a man up. Sex is always a popular topic, another bottle is opened and they inquire if the Farang was cable of the act after being beaten. Not knowing the Thai for saying that it was always an essential part of the act, he acts it out with symbols, causing more hysterical laughter. Everybody sits and sips at the beer and ice; they will have a drink at the party but they will have to make sure that the drunken husband gets home alright or doesn’t sneak off to his girlfriend (mia noi).

Their faces would pass in the West amongst women half their age who spend a fortune on creams and moisturisers, hard bodies from real work and magnificent hair usually tied in a bun. It will be allowed to flow free at the party.
They don’t only work the rice fields and markets, they can be seen in the cities selling tee shirts on Beach Road, cheap watches at Patpong and stir frying on the Sukhemvit Sois.

Their daughters turn up in the afternoon in expensive school uniforms and help chop onions, their sons pull up on Honda Dreams with university girls sitting on the back, eat for nothing and depart with pocketfuls of baht. Their husbands arrive after closing time and relieve them of the real money. God help them if they hold back or even if he’s just in a bad mood after losing at cards all day.

If you walk past in the small hours of the morning you will see them sitting in group sharing a bottle of beer with ice, some of the older bargirls finishing work will stop and join in, sending to the nearby Seven Eleven for an extra bottle. They will talk about whether their daughters are having sex too young, if their sons are doing drugs or why their husbands stay out all night.
Stop and have a talk occasionally, you may be asked to join them and eventually you will get to know some real Thai people.